Scripture
8I am not sorry that I sent that severe letter to you, though I was sorry at first, for I know it was painful to you for a little while. 9Now I am glad I sent it, not because it hurt you, but because the pain caused you to repent and change your ways. It was the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have, so you were not harmed by us in any way. 10For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death. 2 Corinthians 7:8-10
Observation
The Church in Corinth was going sideways quick and out of all of his church plant children these kids had him the most concerned. He was so concerned that he dropped in on an unannounced trip to bring some correction to the spiritual abuses that were going on. Rather than things getting better, it seemed that this pastoral visit made things worse. So, this time around, he sent a “severe letter” with Titus and, as he admits here, was not confident it would be received in the spirit for which it was sent. He was overjoyed to hear that unlike his last visit, his letter brought about the godly sorrow that leads to the fruit of repentance. If it was sorrow only that wouldn’t change anything. Spurgeon described this painfully beautiful moment of repentance this way, “In repentance there is a bitter sweetness, or a sweet bitterness—which shall I call it?—of which, the more you have, the better it is for you. I can truly say that I hardly know a diviner joy than to lay my head in my Heavenly Father’s bosom and to say, ‘Father, I have sinned, but thou hast forgiven me; and, oh, I do love thee!’ ”
Application
Parenting is not for the faint of heart. Every parent has felt this “sorry, not sorry” moment Paul describes here. Especially when we are having to call our kids on something they are doing that we can clearly see is leading them away from the God-given path He has for laid out for them. Susan Scott defines these moments as Fierce Conversations that “help us get at the ground truth of ourselves & others, help us act with courage, compassion & confidence. Straight talk.” “Fierce” doesn’t mean speaking in anger, but rather speaking the “truth in love” (Eph. 4:15). I saw the fruit for these Fierce Conversations this past Tuesday night. My second-born Aden has always been the most “gung-ho” of all my boys. He’s always been “all in” on anything he is doing. This passion and drive is incredible to behold when pointed to Christ and heart-breaking when turned away from Him. He brought his first message ever to our House Youth and talked about how the season of our family move from Hawaii to California he was the farthest from God he’s ever been! I remember we had some fierce conversations during that season where I had to call him on some stuff I was seeing and I always left those times with that “sorry, not sorry” feeling. I was hoping and praying Aden was hearing my heart for him in the middle of the correction. He chose the godly sorrow and the fruit of his repentance was on full display. Tuesday I had a hard time holding it together as he shared with the youth his spiritual journey of learning to trust God in the middle of the trial no matter how hard it feels. It was one of those parenting moments where I stood and marveled at the grace of God at work in my son in spite of my very imperfect parenting.
Prayer
I can’t thank You enough Lord for how much You love my boys. Thank You for a love that never gives up on them. Thank You for showing me what to say and when to say it. Thank You Jesus for speaking to me what I don’t want to hear, but need to hear! Thank you for loving me enough to call me on my rebellion and pride and not being a passive parent. You have actively called me closer to You and I thank You for the doing the same with our boys. Break my heart for the things that break Yours so that I don’t just coast on last weeks conversations with You.
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