Scripture
3Then Absalom would say, “You’ve really got a strong case here! It’s too bad the king doesn’t have anyone to hear it. 4I wish I were the judge. Then everyone could bring their cases to me for judgment, and I would give them justice!” 5When people tried to bow before him, Absalom wouldn’t let them. Instead, he took them by the hand and kissed them. 6Absalom did this with everyone who came to the king for judgment, and so he stole the hearts of all the people of Israel. 2 Samuel 15:3-5
Observation
Here’s King Saul the sequel. The best looking man in the land working the angles, coming in with horses and chariots to catch everyone’s attention. Absalom positioned himself at the gate to find people in need and gain their trust through flattery and attention. He wouldn’t let people bow before him, though that was clearly his ultimate objective. Instead he would reach out and embrace the person making them feel seen and heard and like the most important person in the world. He would sow discontent with the people of Israel in a subtle way as he implied his rule was far superior to the current administration. Yet, if anyone accused him of doing so he could simply say he was helping his father the King and strengthening his kingdom. His end goal was to win the hearts of the people in order to win the throne from his father David. Absalom did this day in and day out for four years until he knew the hearts of Israel belonged to him. A master politician is one who love bombs you until you give him the power to actually bomb you.
Application
According to Psychology Today, “Love bombing is the practice of overwhelming someone with signs of adoration and attraction…Narcissists in particular are known for their skills at manipulation, as much as their penchant for self-love. They may use flattery and attention as tools to build themselves up as the perfect partner, the better to gain your trust, affection—and, ultimately, adoration. Narcissists often learn through experience that once partners see through their facades, the relationship may self-destruct. Once they have convinced you of how good the two of you are together, a narcissist will try to shape your role in the relationship into a member of their "supporting cast." This is so common place in both the secular and religious environments that it often times takes a stepping away from the relationship to see what was really going on. When you contrast the manipulation of the Love Bomb to true scriptural love you see the distinctions right away. In John 15:13 Jesus stated, “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” True love serves the other rather than themselves. True love is sacrificial rather requiring sacrifice from you to prove your loyalty. True love promotes the agenda of the Holy Spirit in a persons life rather their own agenda. True love doesn’t bomb but rather builds up. “25But Jesus called them aside and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their superiors exercise authority over them. 26It shall not be this way among you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave— 28just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:25-27
Prayer
Thank You Jesus for showing us what true love looks like. In Your upside down kingdom you have call me to sit at the gate and notice the need of people. Not to point them to me, but to point them to You through love and service with no strings attached. This is the way of the Kingdom. In a world of manipulation and power plays Your love shines as hope for the cynical heart who was been love bombed and shell shocked and has no trust for anyone in positions of authority. Use me Lord to model a different way of serving, loving and giving.
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